Monday, April 23, 2012

No longer a victim and much more than a survivor

Become the Creator
of your own
"unlimited life"
A quick note today...

About the "aha"

That became the truth

That set me free. 

Like many others who were living a life of "less than"...

I subscribed to the idea that "support" was that place where I could vent


and moan

about my past

my pain

my today


and tomorrow.

That just really



And I lived there for what seemed 


And in time

I discovered that there is a time and a place for seeking "support" that actually supports my journey 



and out of the muck

instead of staying


in it.

Pouring my pain out day after day with no conscious effort to learn to live beyond it is what I identified in myself as being that "perpetual victim". **

Learning to take responsibility for creating my day included learning how to take responsibility for my life outcome.

Day by day.

Moment by moment.

It meant learning the difference between living in the mindset of  "blame" 

While letting go of the self blame and shame that fueled my self hatred and perpetuated my victimhood. 

Which I wore very welll...btw:) 

This is the place where I give responsibility to those who let me down 

And take responsibility for becoming the creator of my own "best" life.

Focusing on my pain, seeking sympathy in the guise of "support" kept me stuck and struggling for many many years. 

I'd been victimized - I was no longer a victim. 

I had survived - but wanted to live beyond survival. 

This is my passion today...

To share the truth that set me free and allowed me to become the creator of my "best life" vs the perpetual victim of life. 

The biggest lesson I learned about the emotional healing journey?

Is that its not about "fixing" what was broken

but about learning how to live.

This week...

Use your inner wisdom to guide you to a place where you are allowed to feel your pain and grow through it instead of staying stuck in it.

Thank the helpful friends who offer their sage advice and - find those who will allow you your voice. 

Seek comfort in compassion vs distraction.

Learning to sit with and go through our pain is how we grow beyond it. 

I'm sorry you suffered.

I'm sorry for the losses you experienced...

I feel angry knowing that there are many who have experienced RBT's* at the hand of those who were intended to love, honor and cherish...charged to nurture, guide and celebrate the life that lives in you.

And I'm so




You have chosen to share the journey.

We were powerless.

We are no more.

We can take back our todays

Create our tomorrows

And live the life we adore.

You've got the magic in you. 





You're on!

Let your light shine in the way you create your life.

It. Is. Never

"Too late".

Always there...


We can learn to live beyond the pain of the past and take back our tomorrows by the way we choose to live our today. 

True story:)

RBT's* = Really Bad Things (and I am so so sorry you or someone you know may have experienced RBT's) 

**(The opposite of of a constant focus on our pain is denying, avoiding and otherwise ignoring that I'm even in pain - listen in here for a story about that: Empowering Solutions on Blog Talk Radio with Heal My PTSD)

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Patricia Singleton said...

I love the way that you have described the whole process of healing here. So many people get stuck in the blaming stage and never go any further. That is so sad to me. We are all worthy of healing and becoming whole again. Thanks for sharing your words in this post.

Susan said...

So glad this made sense .. I'm always grateful when you drop by...your experience, personal journey...I always feel very validated by your comments. Thanks Patricia:) said...

I suddenly felt the urge of coming out and take the risk.