Continuing with taking a look at "Boundaries" from "Learning to "share" meant "no boundaries"...
And while the intentions are always good I think (If you would just do _______then you would be ok/solve that problem etc) the result was that this kind of relationship that insisted on telling me what and how to do things, how to think, feel.
These were the relationships where my life choices and decisions were constantly in question and what I found was very much related to the lack of confidence and told me that I was not capable of finding my own answers or living my own life without someone else's validation.
These were also the relationships where I found that I started to build walls to keep questions and inquisitions to a minimum to protect myself from feeling "less than" or "stupid" or subject to someone’s opinion about how if I would just do what they told me that I would then be "ok".
Very often these were also the relationships that were based on fear as I would avoid "rocking the boat" for as long as I could until at some point we would move past "honeymoon" to "tension" and ultimately to the drama of some sort of a "blow up" that typically came when I was acting of my own volition outside of the influence or control of these persons.