Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Claiming A New Paradigm For Myself-Part 2

(def) paradigm |ˈparəˌdīm|
noun1 technical a typical example or pattern of something; a model : there is a new paradigm for public art in this country. See note at model .a worldview underlying the theories and methodology of aparticular scientific subject : the discovery of universal gravitation became the paradigm of successful science.

Throughout my journey I have learned to rely more on my own ability to gain an understanding of and make decisions relating to the direction I have chosen to take (learning to fish for a lifetime) vs depending on others to provide me my answers or offer me my solutions (being "fed" for a day).

I had a need to understand the current "medical" or "biological" model of the mental health system and the psychology behind it.

I mean...I couldn't just go "off the deep end" and make things up - that would be, well, most would consider that to be "crazy". :)

I thought if I found an understanding of my issues and the available solutions - then maybe I could figure out what it was that I was doing "wrong"...

why I wasn't getting "better" after committing myself to following the instructions of the "providers" that held my life in their hands for over 15 years...

why I was still depressed, anxious, manic, irritable, my relationships were still volatile so isolation was my "safe place". Why I couldn't sleep for more than a few hours without waking and oftentimes unable to get back to sleep.

Why after 15 years of "therapy" and "meds"....the "magic combination" hadn't been found for me still.

What I found in my research, education, through my own experience, insight and in conversations with my providers themselves after having "woken up" from the deep cognitive and emotional trance of living in a drugged stupor all those years....

is that they - the "providers" of these "mental health" services" - really didn't know how to help me and relied on "meds" and "talk therapy" to "manage" my thoughts, emotions and behaviors; they "needed" me to be "biologically defective" in order to fit into their "paradigm".

"Wellness" was not a part of their beliefs - their "paradigm" - in the "biological" model of "mental illness".

And I wanted more from life than what this "paradigm" offered me.


I hope you'll join me here again as I continue to unravel this idea of "paradigm" and making that mind-shift from dependence on others for my answers to finding and creating my own paradigm of "wellness" based on my personal belief that with new information I could make the choice to find "wellness".

The next article in this series will post next week - I'd like to invite you to register for email updates (on sidebar) to be notified of new content.

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